Ok, I know I'm going to college. It's never been a hard choice to make, and there's really never even been a question about it. Even if I happened to win the lottery and was the new owner of 5 million USD, I would go to college. Sure, that would make things a hell of a lot easier for me- no worries about taking out loans or having to work and do skoolz at the same time, but I wouldn't make that an excuse for me not to work or go to school.

Anyway, I think my first mistake was putting my e-mail addy on the P(reliminary)SAT for colleges to send me junk and pester me at their leisure, and without wasting pulpified trees on me. So now I have approximately 100 e-mails in my inbox, if not more, from various colleges (most of them out-of-state and I'd hardly consider attending them), many of which I'll end up deleting without reading because of that, or because they're a religiously-affiliated school, or whatever makes me delete things.

So yeah, I was talking to someone on TEH EM ESS ENss and referred to how many e-mails are restlessly wading through my inbox, making the trip from the front page to the second, third, and so on. I have exactly 162 e-mails right now. Granted, some of them aren't from colleges, but most of them are. And if I happen to not click on the message they send me, I get another one, asking me why I didn't open the last one. It goes something like this:

Hannah! I know you're online, why didn't you read the last e-mail we sent you ten minutes ago? We'd really like to inundate you with more information than you can read during the five minutes per week that you don't spend doing homework or studying, so get on it, chick. Also, if you click this link now, we'll take a few dollars off of your tuition!

If you don't click, we've just dispatched a litter of trained guard dogs, and since we're the top science and engineering school, will be able to have them teleported to your house before you can shit yourself.

Or, they take a nicer tone, but are equally annoying:

Hannah! It's glad to see you... err, glad to know that you just opened this e-mail! You didn't do the same with the last e-mail we sent you, so we were starting to get worried. 'cuz OMG I had a friend one time, and I sent her an e-mail every half-hour or something, and she like, well like, she didn't open them one day and I found out that she had GOTTEN PREGNANT, and like ZOMG I so don't want you to get pregnant, unless you want to. But since we are a Christian school, if you're pregnant we will stone you. Unless you're married, but since we're Catholic on top of Christian, if you're married you shouldn't be going to school, and we'll stone you anyway.

So yeah, if you want to click on this link, we'll send you some more info and maybe a condom but you can only look at it. And a free window decal! Cuz zomg we're sooo the shit, the whole campus smells. But only metaphorically! hahaha, thanks Hannah!



INTP - "Architect". Greatest precision in thought and language. Can readily discern contradictions and inconsistencies. The world exists primarily to be understood. 3.3% of total population.
Free Jung Personality Test (similar to Myers-Briggs/MBTI)



Yes, I'm updating finally. My feet stink.

On a related note, so does band. Not the cool bands where you have (real. not 50 year old) groupies and get to sell cool apparel (not crappy ugly stuff and fruits and cheesecakes and various other crappy things) and stuff, but the kind where you have to play an instrument, often in front of everyone else in the band, by yourself. And generally, if it is of the marching variety, you're outside in all extremes of weather. Which may or may not ruin your instrument.

Anyway. My feet still stink, and I need to read a lot. Feh.



Well, school's been crazy. And by crazy, I mean omg. Sort of. Anyway I decided to make a bunch of banners to use to link this to my myspace, just because. And they look awesome. And all of them are from my original photos and whatnots. I'm mostly talking to myself here, but that's ok. Anyhow, I should probably get around to actually reading some stuff for history, and maybe finish being a music [censarred to protect myself from .gov] of sorts.... cough cough. No I didn't say that! I'm a privateer. The queen told me to do it. And by queen I mean me. I mean... err, yeah I mean me. Suck it.



Now I remember what I wanted to type- it was when I first got to church, and I had basically just chugged about 21 ounces of diet coke. They were praying (or singing, but probably praying cuz that's funnier) and I wondered what everyone would do if I let a gut-busting burp rip. I would probably end up convulsing on the floor with laughter, and my dad probably would have ended up bursting a gasket (people have those, don't they?).

Speaking of weird bodily happenings, apparently there's a medical sort of guy that attends to my school's athletes when they do something bad, and he said this one kid's spleen was going to explode... only, the person in question only had to use the bathroom. I want a job where I can act creepy (well, he creeps me out and from what I hear, I'm not the only one) and mis-diagnose medical problems and still get paid. It's almost as good as "Spit in your scrambled eggs at IHOP girl." I've never actually met one, but I 'd imagine they're generally surly, have excessive amounts of arm hair, and you never see them during a full moon.

Also, "that's what he/she said" is probably the coolest phrase ever. When used correctly. Otherwise it's stupid. Anyhow. Don't be lame, pass the blame. I wonder what would happen if I decided to campaign for public office, and used that as my slogan? I mean, people couldn't resist voting for me (even bugs are attracted to greatness... which also explains why mosquitos seem to wait for me to go outside and why I spend the summer months as a giant mosquito bite), so all they could do is act enraged, and maybe throw rotten foodstuffs at my headquarters. In which case I would throw partially soddied religious documents back at them, and possibly cackle over a loudspeaker. Yes, I'm starting to like this.

I also know why people don't like clones- you know some dumbtard is going to get one, and then decide to run for president. "What's better than one planet-killing dumbass? Two of them! And his wife likes it too!" Oh. My brain. I fear for the future.



I forgot something else cynical I was going to write, and then I remembered it but I forgot it again. Why does that always happen? Anyway I have to draw something with a plug on it, and then do some squiggly things behind it. Feh feh feh.

Apparently German is progressing- they added some new verbs such as "googeln" or something like that. Yeah. I heard it from this guy who graduated from my school a couple years ago. He lives in Austria! He must be smart or something. His glasses told me that. Anyhow, he said you could say "Ich habe letzte Nacht gegoogeln" which is supposed to mean "I googled last night." He told us some other stuff too, but that was the best thing.

When I feel like it, I'll add some of my awesome links. Like Awesometown. I mean, it speaks for itself, but I'll probably write about it too, just to add a tinge of my own awesomeness. Yeah, cuz I can do that.



So, something's wonky and I had to make a new blog, so goodbye old blog. FEH! I feel like I'm going to pass out BECAUSE THERE IS NO AIR CONDITIONING ON THIS MO-FO-ING HOUSE. Or in... whatever...

Anyhow, I don't feel like re-introducing myself cuz I know who I am and if you don't, you don't deserve to.

So. Church. Normally I don't have anything against it, but when I'm forced to go multiple times with only thinly veiled lies or whatnot, then I get pissed . But today I struck back. Sort of metaphorically, but that's not a big deal.

Anyhow, I'm not going to go into the whole thing, but it's slightly funny to think of the whole Christianity thing as a metaphor for using the toilet, as it were. Especially when the songs fit.

The sermon today was on divisiveness. I would have been somewhat impressed that they actually spelled and/or pronounced that correctly, if I wasn't being (sort of) called the Devil. The crazy preacher guy was like "You're either good or evil. If you don't serve god, then you're evil. And divisiveness is demonic." So I told my dad that.

Apparently satan has a thing against babies, cuz he wants to ruin relationships... ok so where will he get his minions if people aren't having babies? Oh wait, it doesn't require a relationship to make babies. I almost forgot. Oh yeah, and self will is evil too. "Bad timmy, why did you do your homework instead of reading the bible? 50 lashings!" I'm really starting to feel ill. Oh yeah, and if I touch the offering plate I'll turn into ash. This is just theory but I wouldn't want to prove it. I might get smeared onto peoples' foreheads some stupid wednesday in the spring for some stupid reason.

So more about the songs. They were stupid, so I jazzed them up in my head. It was fun, it kept me from wanting to kill people, and it made me smirk, so I was smirking in church, which made me smirk even more. It was entertaining. Anyhow, I changed some of the words, mostly if I could get a good rhyme out of it. There was this one song where the only words seemed to be "we are many, but we are one body in christ" or something like that. so my version was "we are many, but we are one (excrement) in (colon)" It could have been better, but I was already smirking so I didn't care. Whooo lightheadedness. Gonna go and make sure I don't die or something. Wouldn't want to go to hell or anything.